Top 10 Gifts I Want in the Hospital
Spending days in a hospital bed can be downright miserable. Want to be an Awesome Hospital VisitorFriend™? Sneak one of these ten things through security.
Mix and Knead Well
Perhaps the most oddly comforting thing about joining the Mennonite club is they insist that suffering never be done alone. This week, my family gathers in Manitoba to celebrate the life of Hannah Penner.
An Open Letter to You on the Worst Day of Your Life
What to say to someone whose life has just turned upside-down.
What It Feels Like to be Accused of Murder
On Monday, I started teaching again for the first time. On Wednesday, the hospital tried to hospitalize me for low blood pressure. On Friday, I got a cold and stopped sleeping. On Saturday, I was accused of murder. And my body fully accepted this as normal. Let’s start from the beginning, shall we? A police…
Has God Forgotten Texas?
In tragedy, Christians unfailingly ask, “Where is God in my suffering?” Here’s one promise to cling to on your worst days.
Decisions
This is us yesterday, celebrating. Zach was singing and dancing in a very un-Mennonite way. I’m sorry that it’s been about six months. Please forgive me because it wasn’t at all personal…it’s only that I had a lot I needed to get done. I realized around Christmas that I was hungry for something that…
No Kate Left Behind
This. This right here is the most powerful thing I know: this bizarre freight train of love for a boy who asked for a fly swatter (see bottom right of photo) and car keys (without a car) for Christmas. This is my beating heart. I leave hours and hours open every day to be someone’s…
Delayed
When Toban came to find me in the cancer center waiting room, we both knew that was probably one of the most important days of our lives. So he immediately started to laugh when he got close enough to realize what I was doing in the meantime. I was on the phone with CNN explaining…
Alone
Most of my worst thoughts hover around a single word. Alone. For a long time, I felt like I was the only person in the world who will die. It was the weird feeling that began in the haze of my diagnosis. I remember standing in the lobby of Duke Hospital, waiting for them to…
The Hard Way
“There’s the gradual, long way up the mountain—and that’s the easier way.” My oncologist is looking at me very sternly, which I know is difficult for him. He’s very nice, and this is the closest thing he’s ever given to a lecture. “And then there’s the steep, fast climb—and that’s the harder way. You’ve been…
The Two Month Challenge
Every two months I walk up to the edge of the cliff. Will I live another two months of uninterrupted life? Meandering walks with Zach. A deep pour of wine on a patio somewhere. Everything begins to feel like it is made of glass. It started when I joined the clinical trial at Emory, and…
Anniversary
I was twenty-two when I got married. Young. Dumb. Happy. And quick on my feet. That was fourteen years ago today. I married the boy I met at Bible camp because he was funny and kind and absurdly good looking. We stood in a barely air-conditioned church in front of gobs of Mennonites and friends…
